Pocket Change: To Ti-hui, and Why it’s Important

Have you ever had the chance to learn a new language? And I mean really, really learn it? I’m not talking sophomore in high school, hope I get at least a C in my Spanish class, but really trying to get it into your head kind of learning???

In the fall of 2005, I flew across the ocean and landed on the beautiful island of Taiwan, where I would spend the next 15 months of my life. I stepped off the plane with no more than 12 weeks of training in Taiwan’s national language – Mandarin Chinese. I could say small stuff… “Can I use the bathroom?” “How much does this cost”. I could count from 1 to 100. Woot! But as I began that adventure, I learned very quickly how much I didn’t know, and all that I would need to learn to survive.

Chinese is hard, and I had to really work at it! But I had a lot of help, and I never gave up. By the time I boarded the plane heading back to the U.S. of A., I was amazed at how much Chinese I could both understand and speak. I was dreaming in Chinese sometimes, and I could even read a few hundred characters. Cool? Yes, very cool!

One of the Coolest things I learned as I was struggling to conquer the Chinese language, however, is that sometimes words just don’t translate. There are a lot of words in English that don’t translate into Chinese. And vice versa.

There is one case of this non-translation that I want to explain, because it relates to change. It helps with my perspective on BIG changes, BAD changes, changes that knock us off our feet. The Chinese word is Ti-Hui 體會. The first part – Ti – means body. The second half – Hui – means to be able to do something or to see. So to Ti-Hui something, it means you are able to see or understand because you were there in body. In other words, understanding by experience. (Can you think of a single word in the English language that has that same meaning? I can’t.) I doesn’t translate, but it’s an amazing concept.

What does this have to do with change, you ask? Well, I think it is why change just exists as part of life. There are some things that we can learn from observing other people. Like the things you learn from the pyromaniac neighbors on the fourth of July or how you could train for a race and succeed through watching a good friend go through the process. We can learn both good and bad from watching the lives of others. But let’s be honest, don’t we learn the best lessons when we experience things ourselves? I know I do. Even when it’s hard, even when it’s a huge change. Even, and especially when, it hurts.

I remember as I anticipated the birth of my first baby having mothers and non-mothers say to me “Having this baby will change EVERYTHING!” At the time I thought, duh! Of course it will! But did I know what they meant? Heck no! Not until I went through a C-section, brought my little bundle of joy home, my Mom went home and my hubby went back to work did I begin to Ti-hui what they really meant. That little girl I brought home is now an energetic 2 year-old, and her little brother is almost 11 months. And I’m still experiencing change after change that comes with the journey of motherhood.

My point in all of this is this – it’s important to experience things. Going through big changes is what gives life to our lives. When we understand things from our own experience, it brings wisdom, knowledge, joy and understanding that we can’t obtain any other way. And to me, it is well worth it. If I had never boarded that plane to Taiwan, I wouldn’t know countless hours of struggle to get my tones just right and pronounce Chinese properly, but I also wouldn’t have the amazing friendships with so many of the wonderful Taiwanese people that I now treasure.

There are so many experiences – learning a language, becoming a mom,whatever – that involve huge changes, but make our lives worth living. So next time a big change creeps up on you, think about Ti-Hui. Look for what you can learn from change. You might be surprised out how your experiences, both good and bad, mold you and change your life for the better.